Everyone I know and every pet I have ever had has had multiple nicknames. While I like to think of the practice in a terms-of-endearment type of vibe, I imagine it is not always perceived as such. Since Mimi is unable to speak our language, her opinion in this matter will remain, forever, unregistered. Humans I know may want to weigh in but this is blog is about my life with Mimi not my life with Humans. That would be a much different blog…I think.
Lately, Mimi’s actions have revived the monicker (god, what a pretentious way of phrasing this…it’s almost like I’m becoming a prose poet except for the fact I don’t know exactly what the difference is between a poet and a prose poet. Also, I don’t want to know) “Beans.” I dubbed her Beans in early fall because, well, she was full of beans most mornings. She never really responded to that name but then again, it was never intended to get a response from her. It was, simply, funny to me. As it happens, the past week or so, Mimi has been having freak out periods in which she literally bounces off the furniture while sprinting around the house. This is not unusual because I have seen other dogs do this. There are many reasons why this happens but that’s not the point of today’s entry.
Today is about listing off Mimi’s alter egos with brief commentary about each one. In no particular order, here they are:
Mama Mimi–this one was given by housemate Ian after we watched The Godfather one night. It is simultaneously anti-Italian and anti-dog. Good work you Waspy son of a…
Any variation of Mama, Mumu, Momo…for reasons that are fairly obvious.
Venom–because she spreads herself out when she pees and looks like, you guessed it, Venom.
Darkness–she’s almost completely black. Is this racist? Um, I think no if you do it in Dave Chappelle’s Rick James voice. (I’m fairly certain I spelled Chappelle wrong but who cares? Nerds, that’s who.)
Midnight–see Darkness
Crazy Eyed Mimi–when she’s running at full tilt her with her ears flapping and eyes looking, yup, crazy. If you watch Curb Your Enthusiasm you’ll know this reference.
Mims–after the one hit wonder rapper who penned This Is Why I’m Hot. I just took the “i” out of Mimi. Genius.
There others that I won’t agree to but they should be listed: Pretty Lady, Trouble, Mimi Larue.
Of course, I also call her every curse word I can think of but those can’t qualify as nicknames. Yet.
